Grieving a Newspaper

When each of us was born, my mom bought a newspaper. (Back then, we still had a lot of printed news.) She thought it would be a fun keepsake. And she was right. Little did I know four decades later, a newspaper would be one of the things I grieved the hardest.
I was born on Thanksgiving Day in 1981, and if you are from my generation or one before, you know that means the Newspaper was FULL! (I remember, as a ki,d waiting for the newspaper (and the ads) that came in that paper in subsequent years.)
Mom bought the paper, the Grand Rapids Press – the larger paper – for each of us. She saved them until we were older. At a few points, as children, she pulled them out of safekeeping for us to look at. But shortly after they were safely tucked away again.
Later, as I became an adult, that paper was given to me. There aren’t words to describe how special a newspaper was. It probably seems silly to some of you reading this. But the fact that this woman who had all of these things going on in her life, and who had just had babies, had gone out of her way to think to buy us a gift that we would not understand the value of for decades to come, was incredibly special and sacred.
That newspaper was always one of my MOST cherished belongings. It wasn’t just the paper and a time capsule of the day I was born. It was so much more. In the darkest and hardest moments of my life, it was a reminder of how loved I was, and it was a connection to my mom that I had my entire life.
I kept it in the same bag she had stored it in, and inside of a memory box that I was certain would keep it safe.
My paper is just one of the most special of the thousands of things that I lost when I lost my home. It’s just one of the things that I literally cannot ever replace. It’s just one of the things that I have needed to grieve in the darkness of the night, when everyone else is asleep this year, so that no one could hear the sounds that escaped my body as I sobbed.
I understand that some people will say (and have) that it was “just a newspaper”. It was so much more.
It is time to finish grieving that chapter, and to move forward to rebuilding and putting down roots.
I bought a steamer trunk on Facebook marketplace (used for ten dollars) this summer as I began to try to replace items I would need. And I think that this year, I’ll buy a Thanksgiving newspaper, and use it to line that trunk, along with a few other projects.
It’s time to begin to build again. It’s time to build a future. I cannot change what has happened, but I can choose to focus and look ahead and build.
And I need your help to do that.
I didn’t just lose the newspaper. I lost everything. And while I have done my very best to try to find things secondhand, I had to replace business things first, as that is how I literally pay my bills and could keep Numi and I under a roof these past 10 months, fed, and car insurance paid etc.
Sometimes people look at me as a successful content creator and business owner and they see my success. And do not misunderstand me, I AM BLESSED. But this year, I also lost all of my MATERIAL possessions. And some of those are necessary to furnish a home and to live. (Basic things - dishes, silverware, glasses, sheets, etc.)
I have spent the past 8 years pouring into my communities online, and creating content for free, as well as creating courses, and coaching. And now I am asking that if you can help me – us (Numi too), we could use an assist.
Every donation helps! If all of my followers donated even just a dollar or two, it would be MORE than enough to get us into the barndo with the basics, and help provide so U can hit the floor running.
It is with a HUMBLE heart, that I ask you for your help.

Here’s how you can support me:

Have you ever lost everything?  How did you process and grieve?  Maybe you're going through that right now...   Feel free to leave me a comment. 
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